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Law, culture, and Catholicism...up in smoke!

Friday, January 26, 2007

Iran Pledges Space Program Aid to Hail Mary Admin

TEHRAN. (Al Pulaski) Upon hearing that spy probes had been released into Hail Mary Admin, Iran promised to launch a "space program", including "satellite recon" to detect potential probes.

Reactions to the news were mixed. Said Hugo Pompa, local deli owner, "I think this is great news -- the more these kind stick together, the easier it is to see who is who."

The announcement does not come with specifics as to the type of surveillance or longevity of the program, but some speculation has begun. Dr. Blake Whitebread, a Filbert scholar on international relations, believes this is an outreach to similar regimes in order to begin collusive relations.

This conclusion seems to agree with the public statement of Supreme Leader of the Islamic Revolution Ayatollah Seyed Ali Khamenei:
We understand the need to stifle truth and force people to understand our ways. We write threatening letters as warnings and send headchoppers out to kill our perceived opposition, too. For us, these people are our people -- they act as we act and think as we think. We seek to protect them and their ways as we are brothers in the way.

Calls to the Hail Mary HQ were not returned at this time.

* * * * *

UPDATE (10:23 CST)
DUBAI (al Pulaski). Intel reports monitoring the escalation of Hail Mary, Inc.'s military activity show that troops are building at the border.

NATO Command reports that they are building an offensive stance, presumably to appear engaged in border protection. Several anonymous reports indicate North Korean encouragement to make a show of military strength in order to quash opposition to expansionist programmes advocated recently by the Investment regime.