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FUMARE

Law, culture, and Catholicism...up in smoke!

Friday, October 27, 2006

From the Mailbag of Advocatus Militaris

Every week I receive emails on all sorts of topics. Mostly folks write to me and ask my opinion on any number of issues. Sometimes they are downright personal. After much reflection, I thought perhaps these questions and answers may be of profit to others. Thus, I have decided to share some of my "Ask AM" emails and responses with all of you. Remember you can always reach me at: advocatusmilitaris[at]gmail[dot]com.

Dear AM,

Thanks for all the good work that Fumare does for AMSL. Quick question. Who should I vote for Alumni Board? There are a lot of good candidates out there, but I know that some would rather look the other way when it comes to controversy. Any assistance would be appreciated.

Thanks,

Inquiring '04

Dear Inquiring,

Good question. Bottom line, vote for whomever you wish! I can tell you that there certainly are some candidates who have taken definite positions on both sides of the debate and there is no question as to where they stand. As you know, my position is that the Monaghan is doing what he wants, the BoG is complicit with whatever he wants and the Dean is the carnifex. This may seem harsh but there is no easy way to cut it. The treatment of Rice, the contempt for the faculty and the utter disregard for the concerns of the alumni have convinced me of this position. I commend the current alumni board for their courage and I encourage you to vote for people on that side of the controversy.

AM

Dear Advocatus,

I recently got married to a wonderful Catholic girl. We each met while we were in college, dated and now are very happily married and living in Chicago. We are both striving to be holy in our marriage and we have made a great study of the Church's tecahing on sexuality and are convinced of the truth of that teaching. Yet, I am frustrated. My wife is really concerned about getting pregnant right now. I don't understand why--money is not an issue. We have been to NFP classes, have been charting, etc. All the teachers and couples there told me that this would bring us closer. To tell you the truth, I'm not all that interested in the cycles of her body and I don't feel that much closer. Am I wrong to feel this way? I don't know what to do.

Having a Hard Time

Dear Hard Time,

Feels like you're doing hard time doesn't it! But seriously, this sounds all too familiar. Allow me to venture a guess. You guys were probably two very zealous young World Youth Day Catholic types, who went on long walks and said the rosary, sipped tea while reading Gerard Manley Hopkins, and whose idea of marriage was suddenly shattered by the shocking realities of life! Am I correct? I am convinced that God uses trickery to get us to marry and then once we are in that unbreakable bond, the scales fall from our eyes and we realize that we married another fallen human being and not Superman or Superwoman. Love then starts to mature and truly becomes an act of the will--which is what it is. It seems to me that your wife needs to have some faith. For one who seems to profess it, she certainly is not acting it! I'm not sure of what your reasons for delaying pregnacy are from your email, but NFP should only be used for cases of "grave necessity." Otherwise, you guys should be rocking and rolling! As to the NFP "bringing you closer together" bit--what a load! If you are a guy who likes an abundance of syrup this may be true, but come on! My thoughts are that a child tends to bring a couple closer together more than knowing when your wife's cervical mucus is just right. Be not afraid!

Good luck.

AM

A.M.,

I just began smoking a pipe. What tobacco can you suggest? I look forward to your response.

Neophyte

Dear Neophyte,

I have always enjoyed a nice cavendish. Alfred Lord Dunhill has a nice selection of tobaccos which I believe you can get here: https://www.lilbrown.com/Pipe-Tobacco/DUNHILL-Pipe-Tobaccos.htm

Likewise, I suggest the recommendation of E. Kovacs who often comments on FUMARE. I tried his recommendation and it was quite a good smoke. Here it is: http://www.haloscan.com/comments/cryder/116131698018167336/#204740 and, http://www.haloscan.com/comments/cryder/116131698018167336/#204741

AM

Dear Advocatus,

I am a happily married woman who is also active outside the home. I am scheduled to give a lecture on Catholic women in public life tomorrow evening. My problem is that I am kinda nervous. What should I do?

Sincerely,

Katie in D.C.

Dear Katie,

Stay home and wash your husband's socks.

AM

Dear A.M.,

Your extremist views are disgusting! Not only that, your sense of humor sucks. Stop being so judgmental!

Fumare Hater

Dear Fumare Hater,

You first.

Hugs and kisses,

AM

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